Six years ago I was struggling with secondary infertility. I was 32 years old. My husband and I conceived our first child with ease so I knew after four months of trying for our second child, unsuccessfully, that we had a problem. I was at my family doctor’s office every week, begging for the referral to a fertility clinic. Finally, I got a referral.
I’m not sure what I was expecting at first. Dr. B was hopeful about our prognosis, given that we had already successfully conceived one child. It was about six months later, after all the tests were complete, when we got the devastating news that my husband’s sperm had significantly fragmented DNA. To top it off, I had mild endometriosis and an arcuate uterus (heart shaped uterus). We were told IVF (in vitro fertilization) with ICSI (intracytoplasmic sperm injection) was our best option.
First there was the birth control pill, then the stims and then the Gatorade. I produced many eggs. About twenty. From the twenty eggs, we got six embryos. From the six embryos we had four that survived to day three. We put back the two best embryos, on day three.
Going through the journey was painful on many levels; physically, emotionally and financially. It took a toll on my marriage and intimacy. It impacted relationships with friends. I isolated myself because I felt a tremendous sense of shame. My stress level was over the roof. Even curling up in bed didn’t give me comfort. I lost weight, looked pale and felt anxious. My husband was scared of me. I was living in fear based thinking that I would never conceive another child.
At some point during my despair, I somehow stumbled upon an incredible book that completely shifted the way I was experiencing infertility. It was Julia Indichova’s book “Inconceivable” that inspired me to start restoring faith in myself. It made me understand how as humans we are designed to pull away from difficult situations. The book gave me hope to feel more empowered about my situation and instead of moving further away; I moved a little bit closer.
Julia’s personal journey, depicted in her book, influenced the way I was able to grasp the mind body connection. In my depths of despair, right before our IVF cycle, I picked myself up. Just like Julia, I created my own daily regimen that focused on cultivating an inner voice that I could trust and that guided me. Daily yoga, meditation, visualization and even laughter- but that took great effort sometimes. In my two-week wait, right before testing day I threw my hands up in the air and I took a deep breathe. I prayed. I got a BFP, my heart shaped uterus was pregnant with twins.
My story ended happily with the birth of girl/boy twins on March 13, 2014. I am beyond grateful for them. I am also grateful for the experience itself as it taught me so much. Aside from the power of the mind body connection, I learned the importance for self-love and acceptance.
My journey with infertility not only transformed my personal life, it also inspired my work as a social worker to help other women and couples struggling to conceive. I strongly believe we have a choice how infertility impacts us. It doesn’t have to devastate you. It can actually be an opportunity in many ways. An opportunity to go deeper inside and do the healing work that life is guiding you towards.
That’s why I’m sharing this with today. On October 25, 2014 I would like to invite you to join me and 14 other Mind-Body Fertility Experts for a day of inspiration and healing, on your journey back to healthy fertility. Plus a special keynote address by Julia Indichova.
Join us for the Mind-Body Fertility Conference in Toronto
Here’s a sneak preview of what to expect:
- Relax your stressed-out mind with a team of experts who will enlighten you about the power of the ‘Fertile Mind’ in the morning
- Tune into the wisdom of your body with a team of experts who will guide you back to the ‘Fertile Body’ through acupuncture, naturopathy and fertility yoga & meditation in the afternoon
- Cultivate strength to trust in the Divine Timing of your baby’s arrival in a special presentation with Tara Antler
- Restore faith in your own fertility with Julia Indichova’s keynote address who gave birth at age 43
Plus hear from experts like:
- Sex Therapist Rae Dolman on how to rekindle relationship intimacy after or during infertility
- Dr. Ellen Greenblatt on ‘Mind-Body Medicine for Fertility’ – what the statistics say
- Shawn Gallagher on using hypnosis to improve your chances of conceiving
Yoga Goddess, Zahra Haji, will show you how to use yoga and meditation to restore faith in your body’s ability to conceive.
Holistic Nutritionist Gillian Reid will discuss creating a fertile diet.
Plus Dr. Drew Nesbitt, Dr. Kaleb Montgomery, Dr. Jennifer Hong and fertility specialist Dr. Paul Chan. And much more.
If you’re ready to heal mind and body, on your journey towards motherhood and you’re in the Toronto area, I strongly urge you to join us on October 25th for the first-ever Mind-Body Fertility Conference. And if you use the discount code, MindBody, receive 50% off.